1. I was making my husband’s lunch last night (I know, I’m WAY too nice to him). Anyway, I asked him if he’d like prosciutto on his sandwich. His response, “Do what?”. I repeated myself, dangling the package of prosciutto in front of him.
His reply, “Babe, it’ll make it easier on both of us if you just call that stuff what I call it. Fancy ham. That way we’ll both know what you’re talkin’ about.”
Fancy ham it is…
2. Everything seems to revolve around the bathroom in my home. I don’t like my husband to use MY bathroom, he has been banished to the half bath. Unless we’re expecting company at which time he has to switch to using MY bathroom. But he is not to use MY bathroom under any other circumstances.
He broke this rule yesterday, and left the toilet roll completely and totally empty, not even a sheet of paper for my visit later in the evening. At which time I had to do the famed, “Um, HELLO!!!??? COULD YOU PLEASE BRING ME SOME TOILET PAPER!?”
Well he took his sweet time, to which I made a smart remark about him using all of the paper and not replacing the roll. He just smiled and said, “Seems to me you shoulda checked that out before you sat down!”. GET OUT!
3. “Babe this stew is really good, but it’s kinda makin’ me feel like I’m gonna barf.”
Tell me how this even makes sense.
4. I tell my husband that I am really excited that my girlfriend and her daughters are going to be able to come up to see us in mid-October. He asks, “What dates exactly?”
October 16 and 17.
“Babe, you don’t know what October 16th is?” Um? I don’t know… it’s the day Kristi and her kids are coming up.
“Um, October 16th is the opening day for rifle season. I’m gonna need (note the use of the word NEED) to be out huntin’. I mean, I guess I could just go in the mornin’ then go with y’all to the fair. (I give him ‘the face’) Or, I could go on Sunday. I mean it’ll be open season for a few weeks, I’ll have plenty of time to hunt”.
‘The face’ always works…
How was your evening???