Leonard

How exactly are the following things related?:

2 Styrofoam Plates

1 Large Plastic Beer Mug

1 Blue Tail Lizard

Does this clarify???

Allow me to explain further. I was straightening up my laundry room this morning. You see, I’m a weirdo that likes to straighten up my house prior to the housekeepers arriving. Do any of you do this? I don’t want them to actually know the filth that we really find acceptable for our living conditions, so I “fake clean” just prior to their arrival to make it appear as though I am not actually the world’s worst housekeeper.

But I digress.

As I was straightening up, I picked up a military bag my husband had thrown in the floor, as I did something ran out. As you can obviously guess…it was a LIZARD! Or more technically, it’s a skink. For those of you in the southeast, you’re probably quite familiar with these lovely gems. If you’re not from these parts, you should know that the nature of a skink is that if it gets scared it discards its tail, which if consumed by your pet will cause symptoms of stumbling and confusion.

The last thing we need is for Nigel to eat a skink tail.

I mean, can you see the stress in his little face? He was way worried about me as I built up the nerve to capture this reptile before he took over my home.

And did I mention that it was under my husband’s bag? And did  mention that he is not home? And did I mention that I full-on blame him for the invasion of this creature? And should I mention that he’ll NEVER hear the end of this? And should I also mention that I also had to kill an ant in my house this morning? That too is his fault. I don’t know why, but it is, trust me!

Back to the task at hand. I used the mug to capture Leonard (I had to give the lizard a name). I had him against the floor, inside the mug.

I should also remind you that I am 6.5 months pregnant, so bending over is not so fun these days. So I fiddled around trying to figure out how in the world I was going to get him from my laundry room floor out to the great outdoors.  Meanwhile, I was sweating and huffing and puffing like an old man.

I finally figured out if I cut the lip off of a styrofoam plate, I could slide it under the mug to secure him in there. Then I used a second plate for sturdiness to ensure he wouldn’t sneak out the bottom.

Now it’s time for the release.

Leonard takes a little breath to ensure it’s safe.

Okay, here he goes.

Oh, I have open toe shoes, please please please don’t run back towards me because I will FREAK!!!!!!

Okay, he smells freedom. He’s headed in the right direction.

Run Leonard, Run!

So that’s how my morning has been.

I think I need a drink.

L&V

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This entry was published on April 11, 2011 at 12:14 pm and is filed under Squawkings. Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

8 thoughts on “Leonard

  1. Oh, thank God it was a skink! I was about to vote for “things Natalie ate this weekend” when I saw your list. PS – is it just me, or does it look like that skink may have already been scared by someone previously to being thrown out of your home? His tail looks entirely different than the rest of him. And it’s a little bent at the end. Must be tough to be a skink. On the up side, I love his racing stripes!

    • Skinks are brown or black with stripes, then a blue tail. When they’re young it’s electric blue, it dulls as they age. I think he tried to release the end of his tail when I had him under the cup. He’ll grow a new one quickly!
      Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

  2. Oh my goodness. Thank the Lord we don’t have those things around here!! I would totally freak. We do have the occasionally little tiny lizard, and those things scare me to death.

    I think you are SO, SO brave. Eek…….

  3. “…which if consumed by your pet will cause symptoms of stumbling and confusion.”
    Really? Wow! Do their tails have a poison in them that would cause such a reaction? I have heard of skinks before but here in Central Cal we only have Horned Toads and Blue Bellied lizards. Skinks sound creepy.

    You are brave.

  4. Meghan on said:

    Awww…Leonard is adorable! I always feel so bad when my dogs find them before I do. They think that they’ve discovered a delicacy! I just want the little guys out of my house and in the back yard!

  5. I’m sorry but if I saw that in my laundry room I would have to move! Yuck, I hate those things!! 🙂

  6. Marsha on said:

    I’m glad my son has outgrown his tendencies towards capturing lizards (chameleons, geckos, skinks, etc.) & bringing them to me. They always seemed to escape & take up lodging in our houseplants. But the nut doesn’t fall far from the tree since I was one of those kids, too!

  7. And your sister was helping you by text message to trap the lizard and to breathe. You did so well!!! I will call you the next time I have a big, nasty, fast-moving roach that may or may not fly… 😉

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